An Electronic Mental Health Newsletter from Joel I. Kimmel, Ph.D., P.A. & Associates
Volume 17, Number 8
Every true relationship a person has is built on the ability to trust and trust is the foundation for honesty. Today, it is often difficult to tell when people are being honest. There is so much disinformation, misinformation, conflicting information, and outright lying that knowing what is true can be confusing. If there is no honesty, there is no credibility, and it will be difficult to form personal or even business relationships. What is even worse is when our leaders, regardless of their party affiliation, makes decisions that ultimately negatively affect our lives.
Our August e-Letter is about The Value of Honesty. Dr. Kimmel’s blog is about The Black Telephone and can be found here.
We hope you find the enclosed information helpful and interesting. We also thank you for reading our e-Letters and for the positive and compassionate comments we have received.
The Value of Honesty!
(Photo by Alex Shute)
A healthy society is built upon honesty.
While dishonesty can have short-term benefits such as getting out of trouble, getting your way, and pleasing others, it becomes a way of life. Ultimately, the truth comes out which can lead to anger, distrust of others, reluctance to make commitments, and refusing to accept what is the truth.
Almost everyone has been hurt at some point because of a lie, a secret, or a distorted truth. Being dishonest undermines a relationship and destroys trust. It creates doubt about others and what they may advocate. This leads to not having a sense of safety in a relationship.
Honest people have closer more intimate relationships, better friends, more confidence, less stress, and improved health. Being honest takes effort and a commitment to always telling the truth even when it is difficult.
Being honest is not only about telling the truth but also wanting to do the right thing. This reflects character, commitment, and conscious effort. It is a quality of good leadership and overall wellness.
Being honest requires courage to say and do what is right even if it conflicts with peers or may have negative consequences. The desire for power and control over others often leads to dishonest behaviors which ultimately backfires. People who are genuinely honest are reliable, authentic, respected, and admired
To be honest with others, it is important for people to be honest with themselves. This requires them to know their true values and emotions and eliminate their negative feelings and behaviors. Doing this will help people to develop personal self-confidence and allow them to handle problems and perform better. Life is easier having honest relationships with people who can trust and be trusted in return.
Society functions better with leaders who have honest values and can be trusted.
We offer the following information on honesty:
THE VALUE OF HONESTY!
Honesty is such a lonely word,
Everyone is so untrue
Honesty is hardly ever heard,
And mostly what I need from you… Billy Joel
WHAT TO KNOW!
- Every time we are dishonest, we create a duality; the true world and the world built on falsehoods that require further effort, focus and lying to be maintained
- Dishonesty creates a sense of insecurity in a relationship; lying creates doubts, causes feelings of betrayal, and destroys the sense of safety
- Many people lie because of the short-term benefits: it can help one get out of trouble, it can get one what one wants, and it can give us a sense of power by manipulating others
- But if you lie because everyone lies, what makes you different from others?
- Honesty is not only about telling the truth but also about wanting to do the right thing; It reflects character, commitment, and conscious effort
- Being honest leads to respect, closer friendships, greater intimacy, trust, confidence, wellness and less stress
- Being honest with oneself is the key to developing confidence, trust in oneself, and motivation to try harder
- Being honest with others is a major ingredient of building relationships as it means that you are credible and can be trusted
- Being honest requires an initial decision and commitment to be truthful and the courage to keep this commitment which does become easier over time
- It is more important to be honest than nice to people; being nice but dishonest can lead to misunderstandings, conflict and superficial relationships
- Integrity is being honest and having strong moral principles; it is a personal choice to live by standards of honesty and truthfulness and is the opposite of hypocrisy
- Honesty requires courage to say and do what is right even if you don’t want to regardless of the consequences or whether you will be accepted by peers
- People who are honest are reliable, authentic, trusted, respected, and admired
- Self-growth happens when a person is honest with themselves in order to confront their negative thoughts and feelings and has the integrity to do what is right
WHAT TO DO!
- Make a commitment to always telling the truth and doing what you said you would do
- Evaluate your own system of values and morals
- Do not succumb to peer or social media pressure; strive to be an individual rather than change your values to be like everyone else
- Avoid those who are dishonest, amoral, and untrustworthy
- Emulate role models who are honest and have integrity
- Admit your mistakes and use them as a learning experience
- Seek professional help if you have difficulty living the value of honesty
WE PRACTICE TELEHEALTH AND CAN HELP!
Call us at 954 755-2885 or email us at [email protected]
Joel I. Kimmel, Ph.D. P.A. and Associates
5551 N University Drive, Suite 202
Coral Springs FL 33067
As always, we are interested in your thoughts. If you would like to respond to this e-Letter, email your comments to [email protected] and we will publish them next month.
The information provided in this electronic newsletter is not a substitute for professional treatment. It is the opinions of the writers and is provided solely for educational purposes. For mental health care, seek a qualified professional.
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Copyright © 2022 by Joel I. Kimmel, Ph.D. P.A. and Associates.